Jokes

A Baker`s Son
Once upon a time there was a powerful king.

Having heard of the wisdom of a certain Greek whom he has imprisoned. He sent for him and asked him his opinion of a beautiful horse he had received as a present from one of his man. Pleased with the clever replies the Greek made, he gave him a loaf of bread as a reward.

A second time the king sent for him because he wished to learn the value of some precious stones the had just received. The Greek`s replies were again so admirable that the king gave him two loaves.

A third time the king sends for him and desired to know whose son he was, as he could learn nothing about his own birth. The Greek, after some hesitation, dared to reply that he must have been a baker`s son, for, had he been a king`s son, he would have given cities instead of loaves as a reward for such services.

A Barber`s Joke
There are some boys who think themselves men and go to the barber`s shops to be shaved.

Once a boy came into a barber`s shop and asked the barber to shave him. The barber asked him to sit down, and soaped his face. Then he left the boy alone. He stood at the door laughing and talking with another barber. The young gentleman waited for some minutes and then shouted: "Well, what are you leaving me here all the time for?"

The barber replied, "I am waiting until your beard grows."


After Supper
Before liberation there was a poor man who worked for a landlord. The landlord made the man work all day long, but paid him very little money and didn`t give him enough food to eat.

One day when the man was having breakfast, the landlord came and said to him, "It`s too much trouble to go to work and come back for supper. So I want you to have breakfast and lunch and supper now. Before you go to the fields."

"How can I eat three meals at the same time?" the man thought. But he said. "All right." He finished his breakfast and went out.

Two hours later the landlord went out for a walk. Now what did he see? He saw that the man was sitting under a tree and smoking. The landlord was very angry. "Why aren`t you working in the fields?" he asked. The man said with a smile. "I`ve had my supper and you know very well that after super it`s time to rest."

Birthday Present
One evening Mr. and Mrs. Green were watching television when their door bell rang. Their next-door neighbor was there holding a parcel.

"This is for you," he said to Mr. Green, "The postman left it with us this afternoon because you were both out."

Mr. Green took the parcel into the sitting-room and sat down next to his wife again.

He pulled off the brown wrapping paper and found a book inside the parcel. There was a bill for $19 addressed to him.

"But I have not ordered any books!" he exclaimed in surprise.

"No, darling," said Mrs. Green, "I ordered it. You are giving it to me for my birthday."


Cut Hair
Bill Jenkins worked in a big office in the city, and generally he used to go to the barber`s during working hours to have his hair cut, although this was against the rules: clerks had to have their hair cut in their own time.

While Bill was at the barber`s one day, the manager of the office came in by chance to have his own hair cut. Bill saw him and tried to hide his face, but the manager came and sat beside him, so he soon recognized him.

"Hullo, Jenkins," the manager said. "I see that you are having your hair cut in office time."

"Yes, sir, I am," admitted Bill calmly, "you see, sir, it grows in office time."

"Not all of it." said the manager of the office at once. "Some of it grows in your own time."

"Yes, sir, that`s quite true," answered Bill politely, "but I`m not having it all cut off."

Duel
Two men had accused each other of cheating, and both of them were getting angrier and angrier.

"I`ll kill you!" shouted Patrick.

Milo laughed rude and answered, "You could never kill me; but I could kill you!"

"Just try!" Patrick shouted back, "We`ll fight a duel in the park at five o`clock tomorrow morning."

"No, not in the park," Milo answered. The Police might see or hear us there. Let`s go out to a quiet place in the country."

"All right," said Patrick, "I accept. Let`s go